Oy...

[seiberwing]

So I have returned from Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, having tried to ignore pretty much everyone ever saying it sucks. They obviously had not understood Bay's art, and by art I mean having a loose plot to explain why things are blowing up.

...my head hurts. That is not hyperbole, my head actually physically hurts from the sheer amount of "what the fuck is this what the fuckery" that went into this movie.


The sad part is that I could see the basis of a good plot peeking through. Transformers on Earth thousands of years ago was a decent idea, the Fallen leading a death-to-humans cult vs. Optimus Prime leading a life-to-all-life cult that is so extreme that it actually puts human life above Transformer life (Autobots = PETA?) is a bit more awkward but okay. More robots was a good idea, apparently Bay at least listened to people complaining there weren't enough. Bumblebee supporting Mikaela/Sam was pretty cute in a weird way. Megatron and Starscream bickering was a reasonable scene.

There were some good characters thrown in there too. Simmons as a positive character was a good idea, although they kept trying to make him comedic and that partly ruined it. Simmons/Leo OTP! Jetfire as an old guy who switched sides was cool, I think he was one of my favorites. Bee was...Bee, even this movie couldn't remove the intense love I have for Bee, Bee is win.

There's potential. But it's all put together so horrifically badly and mixed with the kind of toilet humor that South Park fans would find unfunny that it ruins any potential for being interesting. Someone mentioned on RPG.net that the writer's strike occurred halfway through the movie and Bay had to do a lot of it himself--I think this explains pretty much everything.



I'm sorry, Michael Bay. The fighting robots just weren't enough to win me over. Now if you'll excuse me I'm going over to beexsam to comfort myself with some soothing interspecies slash, because the scenes featuring the affirmation of the Bee/Sam/Mikaela OT3 were probably the best part of this movie.

Comments

[seiberwing.livejournal.com]

Mine was up at four am sobbing on the phone to her mom (which woke me up) and then the RA was in there, and then the campus cop, and then EMTs brought an ambulance over and she was freaking because she didn't want anyone seeing her going to the ambulance. She made them go out, and then followed after they were gone.

I saw her ahead of me in line at the therapist's office a few months later. I figure she needed it.

Did you see the person saying on [info]shortpacked that slut Starscream is canon now, because he was getting "sexed up by the fallen for two years"?

Haha, yes. That does seem to be what happened.

[kookaburra1701.livejournal.com]

Well, thanks to your suggestion about Wheelie bringing Mikaela bits of electronics, I had the weirdest dream about him presenting her with the crushed remains of a vibrator. And then he incorporated them into his own parts, and wouldn't stop buzzing.

I'm sure there's a porn movie in there somewhere.

[seiberwing.livejournal.com]

Hasn't the kink meme already done that at some point? I think it was with Frenzy, though.