(no subject)

So I heard about this new movie that's coming out. It's about a woman who gets into a relationship with a guy who is, despite the hot sex, a bit on the clingy side. When she tries to dump him, the guy makes her life hell with what can only be described as "super powers". He throws a shark into her apartment, destroys her car and other bits of property, and directly threatens her life until she gets back together with him. Quite terrifying, no?"

Oh, wait, I switched the genders by accident.

Seriously, how can anyone think this crap is comedy? It's abuse made trivial.

(no subject)

My day was...interesting.

Me: It's a beautiful warm day and I've just gone tubing!

The Universe: O RLY? How about a thunderstorm?

Me: I love thunderstorms! I shall sit here and write poetry by the light of the window.

The Universe: All right, how about the power going out?

Me: Still plenty of daylight, and at least the storm's over. The power company will fix it soon.

The Universe: What about a tree falling on the lines leading to your house? And across half your driveway? And you have 18 Shabbat guests coming over at seven?

Me: ...god, I hate you.

Actually, it wasn't so bad. We had candles and the windows open so it wouldn't be too hot inside, and then I went over to my auntie's for the night (hello wireless and a water heater). And it was funny to sing the Birchot while everyone was fanning themselves with the cards that the words were printed on, because it was so hot.